Tag Archive | poem

Agony

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I am tired of being strong. I want you to hold me.
I want you to say everything’s going to be okay
Pull me into your arms and hold me tight
Because I no longer want to be alone tonight

Say you miss me because I always miss you
Confusion seeps through me as I think of you
What do you want from me. I’d given everything
But sometimes I feel I never meant a thing

But with this, I can’t help but hope for you
That someday you’ll say more than I miss you
Perhaps I’m insane to want you like this
Because I wonder what was behind that kiss

I want to hate myself for wishing this
Do I really deserve you to feel this?
What am I thinking? What’s wrong with me?
I never wanted to feel this agony…

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Nothing

I used to compose 1-2 poems everyday but I kind of forgotten about it since I started working on my novels…. until something unexpected happened that clouded my mind and sparked my poetic side.

This poem is called:

Nothing

I want to hold you but i can’t
Because I’m afraid you’ll just pull away
I want to see you again but i can’t
Because I’m afraid with what you’ll say

We’re friends and I don’t want to lose that
I don’t want to tie you to something I only want
But I want to feel that scorching fire so hot
That burn me inside out that I pant

I want you but I don’t know if you do, too
Was it just because of sudden passion?
Or something deeper burns inside of you
Or it was nothing and out of the question?

I don’t want to feel this and I hate myself now
For feeling this kind of sudden longing
But I’d rather be silent than regret what I’ll avow
I’d rather have you as this than nothing…

All Up to You

Should I hang on to this kind of uncommitted love?

That I have nothing except your words and the Above

Should I love you silently and wait till you come back?

Or just tell you I love you and see how you react

 

Should I hold on to your diamond words and have faith?

That everything is true so I should patiently wait

Can I continue to love you this way but have no right?

And just trust and believe your words on that very night

 

Can I trust myself that I can wait for you that long?

Perhaps yes, cause I’m not in a hurry all along

Can I trust you that you will keep those words you said?

Or it will just fade that I’ll hope it was left unsaid

 

If holding on to your words makes me a fool for you

Then let it be, cause you stole my sanity too

Because over loneliness and pain, I’ve chosen both

That I hope you said was true though it was not an oath

 

All I can hold on are your words and nothing more

But those are not promises cause you haven’t swore

But breaking my heart apart is all up to you

For you’ve owned it even  before you said I love you…

Mere Fantasy

I am dead, withered like the fallen leaves

Waiting when’ll I be stepped by the thieves

Wanting to end this, this sorrow I feel

Wanting to know if this is just for real


Yes, you are indeed gone and it is real

As real as these metal bars of steel

But why do I cannot seem to steal

Away this hollow, emptiness I feel


Why cannot I just tear and rip you out

Off my ever damned heart and shout

That I no longer love you without doubt

And I’ve learned to figure everything out


But why you never even meant your words?

And why you never even bridged our worlds?

Why you never just said your sad goodbye?

Why you never ever just tell me why?


I believed you and that’s a fool of me

You nev’r been here when I’m in agony

You never been here when I needed you

You never been here when I am in blue


So now, what is the use of just waiting?

What is the use of even just wasting?

My dear precious life and time for nothing

Because you never even did a thing


So where are you when I needed you most?

When I am drowned in despair and so lost

When my ever terrible life’s at worse

You never even hear my cry and curse


How could I think I’m important to you?

What kind of fool I was to think you do?

How could I believed you indeed loved me

For you never did, just my fantasy…

I am not what you need

I am not what you need…

You need someone who could wait for you forever

Could go with you wherever you want to

Could give and satisfy your needs

Could listen to your awesome adventures

Could depend on you always

Could lay with you on the grass under the stars

Could give you her endless time

Doesn’t have big responsibilities

Doesn’t have to work hard

Would come with you wherever and come what may

Could fight for you against all odds

Could reciprocate your affection

Doesn’t fall silent when you confess your feelings

Doesn’t think of her responsibilities all the time

Could shout to the world that she loves you very much

Because, I could never be that one

Because I have gone tired of loving you

I could no longer wait for you

I have big responsibilities to fulfill

I don’t have the right to put myself first

I can’t be happy while others are suffering because of me

Because I had loved you, that’s all

But I can’t be what you want me to be

I can’t be waiting for you forever

I am not what you need…

Withered Bridge

My heart is pounding, what’s wrong with me?

Am I in the verge of loving you endlessly?

Am I falling in love to a person who doesn’t love me?

A mere friend I am, what else I would be?

 

The mere message you sent cause my lips to curve a smile

As if we haven’t seen each other for a while

Among other men, I would prefer to love you

Because you’re real and I already know you

 

Is this a kind of story like the first one?

Wherein I fell in love with a lover of someone

That I fell in love with my dearest best friend

Although I know he was in love with my friend

 

Am I a strong bridge or a withered one?

Why do I feel this miserable feeling of being undone?

Why do I always suffer the same twist of fate?

I am here, why are you still looking for someone to date?

 

I feel pathetic and irrationally insane

Why did I let you run inside my brain?

Why did I let you enter my already closed heart?

You opened it once again, discovering my dreadful art…