Tag Archive | bitterness

Agony

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I am tired of being strong. I want you to hold me.
I want you to say everything’s going to be okay
Pull me into your arms and hold me tight
Because I no longer want to be alone tonight

Say you miss me because I always miss you
Confusion seeps through me as I think of you
What do you want from me. I’d given everything
But sometimes I feel I never meant a thing

But with this, I can’t help but hope for you
That someday you’ll say more than I miss you
Perhaps I’m insane to want you like this
Because I wonder what was behind that kiss

I want to hate myself for wishing this
Do I really deserve you to feel this?
What am I thinking? What’s wrong with me?
I never wanted to feel this agony…

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Nothing

I used to compose 1-2 poems everyday but I kind of forgotten about it since I started working on my novels…. until something unexpected happened that clouded my mind and sparked my poetic side.

This poem is called:

Nothing

I want to hold you but i can’t
Because I’m afraid you’ll just pull away
I want to see you again but i can’t
Because I’m afraid with what you’ll say

We’re friends and I don’t want to lose that
I don’t want to tie you to something I only want
But I want to feel that scorching fire so hot
That burn me inside out that I pant

I want you but I don’t know if you do, too
Was it just because of sudden passion?
Or something deeper burns inside of you
Or it was nothing and out of the question?

I don’t want to feel this and I hate myself now
For feeling this kind of sudden longing
But I’d rather be silent than regret what I’ll avow
I’d rather have you as this than nothing…

Good or Bad

It’s been a long long time since I composed a poem, my first writing outlet, and I think I’m kind of rusty now but here it goes…

Good or Bad

I feel so useless like I don’t deserve to exist
I feel so hollow like I am nothing but a mist
I feel so broken that I could no longer be fixed
And now, I feel so much unloved that I had been hexed

I know I shouldn’t feel this way but I can’t help it
I’m so confused that I don’t know how to conceal it
I am not sure if that was just a night of mistake
Or you do want me too that you could no longer take

But then, you are someone I could never have and hold
But because of what you did to me, I feel so bold
But in the end, I feel despair eating me away
Now what’s wrong with me? What have we done? What can I say?

I don’t know if I want to cry for something I lost
Or I’ll be elated with pleasure and pain to boast
How could I treat you the same if something happened?
I don’t know if it’s something good or bad in the end…

Abandoned Bliss Excerpt

PROLOGUE:

I no longer believe in love. Love will only make you weak. I used to believe in love. All those things were just lies. There is no such thing as love. Love doesn’t exist. It will only hurt you…

-Rhavelle Mersine